This is just one Master's opinion on 24/7 Master/slave relationships. It is a topic steeped in controversy and passionate debate. As for me, it is a topic that I have a great deal of emotional investment in. I am grateful for this opportunity to share my thoughts with Talon and the members of his "Eyrie."

Months ago, Talon asked my slave ember and I to write a "24/7 vs real life" article, where we could share how we make a Total Power Exchange real in our every day lives. But during the creative process, we discovered that a change in premise was required. Instead of 24/7 vs reality, we chose to call this article 24/7 as reality. With the following words, we will share with you the truth about 24/7 as we see it, and how we make it part of our life.

Defining the Total Power Exchange (TPE)

Does a Total Power Exchange mean a slave collared, naked and kneeling when Master returns from work? Sometimes. Is it sexual service at the snap of a finger? Of course. A Master/slave relationship exists in the form or many rituals and deeds. But these aren't the most important aspects of a Master/slave (M/s) relationship.

Whether or not you are swayed by our arguments, you will have no doubt that romantic love is the pinion that joins embre and I together. This is not a requirement for all TPEs. You might even hear other Masters and slaves advance the opinion that love cannot exist in an M/s union. For them and theirs, I am sure this is true. But for embre and I, love is an essential element…and it exists in great quantity.

Yet, the old cliché "love isn't enough" still applies. Being a powerful emotion, love inspires joy and commitment, together with anger and destruction. Left alone, love often traps people in cycles of tumultuous and painful relationships. The more passionate the emotion, the greater the peril.

Structure and Discipline

Thankfully, a well planned M/s union offers stability in the form of STRUCTURE and DISCIPLINE. Kinky sex, domination, and submission are just some of the rewards, yet the roles of structure and discipline are easily underestimated. They are key elements to the creation and survival of a TPE. When a Master and slave commit themselves 24/7, they are accepting a tremendous amount of responsibility. The temptations to let roles slip and to forgo important rituals are ever present. Feelings of love can tempt a Master to overlook infractions and fail to punish his slave. These invariably create "power vacuums" that leave a slave confused about roles and expectations. Even worse, they can damage the respect and credibility a Master must command to be effective.

For the Master, structure is there to remind him of his responsibilities to guide and protect his slave. Discipline helps him to live up to the promises he makes when he collars his slave.

For the slave (especially for a passionate one like embre) there are many conflicting emotions experienced during the course of service. Structure reminds her of her choice to be a slave, while discipline enforced gives her the means to live like one.

It all sounds simple in concept…and it is. But the application to life is more far more challenging. Of course, it is here our detractors leap forth and say "Ah ha! The demands of life make 24/7 impossible!" But isn't life itself a complicated, uncertain existence? Why should the life of a Master and slave couple be different? "Real life" does present challenges to and M/s union. But though discipline and structure, it can survive and thrive. So when we hear people say "Life just gets in the way of 24/7", we choose to stand that argument on its head. For us, 24/7 is how we cope with life! As a Master, I depend on embre's service and commitment to deal with daily tasks and problems. As for the slave, she finds comfort and inspiration from the Master's protection and guidance.

Attitude and commitment

We are almost finished with this treatise on 24/7, and I am sure there are many of you who remain unconvinced that it can be real. Where, they ask, are the descriptions of tight bondage, sweet pain and hot rough sex? Isn't 24/7 supposed to be about slaves chained and naked every day? When we think 24/7, aren't we expecting a slave to be ever cheerful and compliant to her Master? But the real answer to what 24/7 is lies in other expectations. 24/7 is, above all, about COMMITMENT and ATTITUDE. As the Master, I am less concerned about how much clothing embre wears than I am about how she feels. Masters who remain aloof and detached from their slave's attitudes can expect to have troublesome, unhappy slaves. If I have a genuine understanding of what motivates my slave and what she needs, then I can guide her service with greater efficiency and less conflict. I do not expect her to be happy and enthusiastic 24/7 either. But I need to know that embre is working through her fears and reservations so that she may serve her Master as best as I know she can.

So…how do I know its working? How do I know that I am living with a real slave and not a fantasy? Simple. Since I met embre, I have seen her pout, resist and challenge my power over her at many turns. Yet there remains an undeniable truth that confronts even the most ardent skeptic: embre has NEVER, EVER denied me what I have demanded, even when she was only my submissive. Has she said "no" to me? Of course. Has she tried to talk me out of what I want? Indeed. But ultimately, she has submitted to my every whim.

24/7 is about power…not just power given and taken, but recognizing the power that each of us has to make one anothers dreams come true. It is also understanding the weaknesses that jeopardize such a union, and working tirelessly to confront them.

Who are you?

Dom, sub, switch, Master or slave…the S/M lifestyle is about living life the way you choose. (Even if it means living by anothers rules!) But even with such a philosophy, it is important to identify yourself properly. There are some of our brethren who misrepresent themselves, and offend others in their midst. Most in the lifestyle wouldn't even consider calling themselves "Master" or "slave" unless they were owners or owned. But there are exceptions both pathetic and laughable. One wonders if the same people call themselves "husband" or "wife" without being married! Does this mean a Master must own his slave 24/7? No. We have friends who exist as Master/slave couples for short periods of time. Some are committed to other vanilla partners. But when the Master and slave are together for a weekend, there can be no doubt that one is owner, and the other is owned. The bottom line? If you are still looking for your charge, you are a Dominant. If you are still looking for one to kneel before, then call yourself submissive by nature.

Furthermore, if Masters are not responsible for their slaves 24/7, and if the slave is not always accountable to her Master, then the term "24/7" is not appropriate. In the example of a the weekend described above, this would not be an example of a 24/7 M/s relationship.